As I wake this morning at 4:35am all I want is sleep. My body wanted to stay in bed.
I am not sure that there is really any good way of easing into this new morning practice of writing at 5:00am with my womyn writers group.
It will be about just diving in!
It’s about jumping in COLD!
A la mala!!!
Pushing myself to get my butt up and in that chair NO matter what!
The thing about this process for me is that NOT showing up… isn’t even an option! These writers are depending on me and I am depending on them. I need their support.
This writing thing… it’s so not easy… the right words don’t always come. And right now I am struggling…
In my dreams I dreamt with my goddaughter… the image was of her in the future. We were having a conversation. We were spending time. It was lovely.
I dreamt so much last night…
So many people showed up. The people who visited brought with them many messages. So many people showed up to tell me important things. These visitors came to show me things.
The messages were about them giving me messages and reminding me of the importance of showing up for people… showing up for myself… showing up for my characters.
Showing up … even when this process is uncomfortable… and YES… this morning writing practice is a REAL adjustment.
In the uncomfortable I will write.
What waking up at this hour is giving me is a fresh start. What I am meditating on this morning is how fragile life is. The newsfeed filled with messages about her passing her name was ELIZABETH RIVERA de GARCIA!
She was a poet… a mother… but how many will know her work. She was a kind soul… she gave of herself generously… she was very loving to me… I am meditating on death… today and how final it really is. LUZ para su espiritu!
With ease I will begin. It doesn’t have to be me working on the novel today. I can choose to simply show up. The pen will do the work. Today I will keep my eyes open even though my bed looks so very comfortable. With ease I will expand and open myself up… slowly and with ease… I will be gentle with myself… I want to feel rejuvenated… I want to feel fresh…
My intention for today is to go to another part of my story… to be guided in a completely unfamiliar direction… to be uncomfortable and honor the discomfort and write anyway….to allow a moment to choose me… To visit a time and place I have seen but never written.
My intention for today is to create something beautiful.
BREATHE ALICIA … today is day two and you’ve only just begun dear… just begin… nobody said it would be easy. Be happy… today you showed up!
And so it is~ Aché
Prompts for today:
As I wake this morning… (set timer for five minutes).
In my dreams… (set timer for five minutes).
In the uncomfortable… (set timer for five minutes).
What I am meditating on this morning is… (set timer for five minutes).
REFLECTION: during and after my 5:00AM session
What I struggled with and what rose for me:
This morning I was in need of inspiration. There is so much I have forgotten in my story. There is so much I have yet to write. There is so much I have yet to discover. I made a decision during our writing session today. I decided that it is very challenging to believe that I am going to be brilliant at 5:00am. It takes time to warm the body up. It takes a moment for the mind to open. Inspiration is necessary. I decided that what I needed this morning was inspiration… I needed to take at least ten minutes to read certain sections of my story. And this is what I have decided to do every morning – reacquaint myself daily with my story…. The morning writing sessions required a stretch. So I honored that. I read today. I found that this helps. Please share what works for you. What helps you to dive back into your stories?